Thursday, January 28, 2010

SECOND STAGE: ANGER

After three days … wala pa ring chikahang naganap between me and MHW. The usual office stuff lang. After that, derm. Wala siyang kakupas-kupas. It’s either he does not really give a shit to what happened between the two of us or masyado lang siyang magaling umarte to conceal his real feelings.

Nagsight-sight kami ni Rica, kelangan ko nang outlet. Witchelles ko ren naman kasi machika sa mga friendiva ko sa office ang eksena namin ni MHW. Parang wit ko pa bet na ipa-learn sa kanila na may enlababo feelings akembang kay kuya.

We decided to have dinner in Araneta. Meet halfway. Parang wala akez sa mood na mag-flysiva all the way to Makati.

So, ichinika ko sa kanya ang eksena habang super lafang lang si ate.

“Try mo kayang kausapin?”, iteckla ang suggestion ng ate Rica ko na napag-isipan ko ren naman pero masyado akez nagpapaka-ma-pride to make the first move.

“Naiinis ako sa kanya!” yun lang ang nasagot ko.

“At baket ka naman naiinis ….”

Chinika ko kay Rica na naiinis ako kay MHW dahil masyado siyang insensitive at masyado siyang heartless. My puppy-love and desires toward him were starting to transform into despise and hatred.

Why me?

I need revenge ….

Umabot ng five floors ang isang kilay ng lola Rica ko at tinitigan lang akez ng masama. Sabay chikang, “Masyado ka namang exaggerated at masyado kang feelingera ….”

“Feelingera?”

“Feelingera … masyadong ma-feeling!”

Nagpatuloy si Rica na parang for the first time eh narealize kong may sense din naman pala si bakla paminsan-minsan. Chinika niya na masyado lang daw ako nagbigay ng meaning sa one-afternoon-stand namin ni MHW. Malaki naman ang posibilidad na wala lang talaga sa kanya ang nangyari at pwede ren naman daw na nadala na lang ng kalasingan si kuya at nagpadala na sa panibugho ng damdamin. Alcohol has always been proven to be a very effective aphrodisiac.

Chika ko naman, “Pero kahit na … lasing o hindi lasing … alam niya ang ginawa niya … at dapat pinanindigan na yon!”

Ang sagot naman sa aken ni Rica: “Baket ‘teh? Virgin ka? Buntis ka? At ano naman ang kailangan niyang panindigan? Na nagpahada siya sa ‘yo? Tanggapin mo ang fact na yon … i-consider mo na lang na isa siyang afternoon delight!”

Witchelles! Witchelles! Ewan ko ba? Pero may ganitrix na factor talaga tayez noh? Super ask ng help and insights from friends pero once they start making sense, we immediately to refuse to believe.

“Kahit na!”, heto pa ren ang bera kez habang nakanguso at nakahalukipkip na parang spoiled brat na tinanggihang maglaro sa tsubibo.

If he wants to give me the silent treatment … then I will give him the loud treatment.

----

Sumunod na araw sa office.

I know … it sounds so bad … pero heto ang unang instinct na pumasok sa isip ko. Yes! Personalan na kung personalan pero ginawa ko pa ren.

Sinimulan kong tirahin si MHW.

It’s time to retaliate …. Lahat nang requests niya … DENIED!

Hinanapan ko siya ng butas …. lahat ng tasks niya .. EKIS ….

Lahat ng mali niya … pinapansin ko at super broadcast sa internal communications with all the other supervisors. Pati na rin sa lahat ng meetings and weekly reviews … hindi ko siya pinapaligtas.

Although, he is not directly reporting to me … He is still under my authority.

Hanggang sa nakahalata ang ibang supervisors … chika nila baket ang harsh-harsh ko raw kay MHW.

Sabi ko naman … “He is not doing his job properly. Somebody has to teach that new guy a lesson.”

“Eh baket mo siya cinertify?” talak ni Anna.

Napa-isep akez. Nakakalokang tanong!

“Oh well! E di ia-uncertify ko siya!”

“Pwede ba yun?”

---

Define ABS Bitter Herbs Capsule? Define imbernadette sembrano ---> BERNZ!

Hay nako! Ganyan talaga ang buhay. Harsh na kung harsh. Pero they say that anger is a natural reaction. According to Physics, in every action … there’s an equal reaction. Sa Psychology naman, when someone or something you feel has deliberately done you wrong – there’s anger.

Lahat naman ng utawsingbelles eh na-iimberna. Luka-luka na lang or Baliwag Bulacan ang witchelles!

Depende na nga lang sa utash. May mga utash na warla mode agad na daig pa si George W Bush kung magdeclare ng all out war. Haves din naman ang mga silent-type saka yung mga tipong super-suppress lang ng feelings, na eynimomentz eh i-uutot na lang nila ang sama ng loob.

Normally, I am the latter. I can find positive things out of bad circumstances. Heto ang natutunan ko sa professional life ko. Ang wrong nga lang eh kung personal and emotional life ko na ang pinag-uusapan eh it’s directly the opposite.

I have grown to become a fighter. I have always been the sorry little faggot that runs away, sulks and cries my guts out in one corner.

Times have changed. I have grown stronger.

Sa mga oras na ito I am channeling the powers of Amor Powers: “MASASAKSIHAN NILA ANG PAGHIHIGANTI NG ISANG ALIPIN!!!!!” …. Bwahahahahah ….

13 comments:

daredevilry said...

easy lang te.

Tristan Tan said...

I like that you recognize that you are angry. As to everything else that you're doing, I'm just gonna keep my mouth shut.

Rygel said...

pero tama si Rica... and baka MHW is afraid that you're expecting too much na hindi nya kaya ibigay kaya akala nya the best thing to do is to keep quiet. If kaya naman, why not pretend the whole thing didn't happen and be back to being whatever you were before

blagadag said...

pinatsupa ka na nga, aawayin mo pa? OA ka bakla. alam mo naman na may jowa yung keke. you're flaunting your weak attitudes. how could you win in such a battle? magkape ka pa.

Galen said...

Ay hindi ko yata ginawa yun. In fairness si Ate Karmi ang bumawi para sa akin.

Haha.

I wonder how the boylet felt nung warla mode ka.

Anonymous said...

bru(ha), kapeng walang asukal lang ang bitter. isipan mo na lng pinagbigyan mo sya.

Anonymous said...

I have been an avid reader since 3 years ago, i think. Never fails to elicit a smile (most of the time, laughter) from me. Kudos!

As to ur recent post, naku neng: natural reaction ng guys un. He is in fact having internal battles right now, weighing all possibilities. Malay mo, he will choose to be with u in the end. Patience. Patience. Patience. Which means continue being nice to him. (I know u r at ur very core)

Sree

~Carrie~ said...

Ateng, isipin mo na lang yung next stage. gusto mo bang may regret na kasama dahil nag-power trip ka? pag nawala ang amor ni MHW sa iyo dahil sa mga nangyari, sa tingin mo ba may babalikan ka? pero i feel for you. maybe, "the more you hate, the more you love" ang drama special mo. I think you wanted something more from your situation with MHW and you got frustrated with the outcome. I may be wrong.

Gerard Catedrilla said...

ayan na nga ba ang sinasabi ko. matapos mo warlakin, narinig mo ba ang mga sagot sa katanungan mo ateng???????????????????

/iambrew said...

Hinay hinay lang teh. You are starting to get scary. Hahaha. Saka sa ginagawa mo kay MHW, people are gonna start noticing and questioning what the hell is going on.

I suggest na kausapin mo xa to get things straight. Masama ang maghiganti, nasusulat yun sa bibliya. Chos!

Hehehe...

MkSurf8 said...

abangan ko yung next stage!

Lance said...

Berns, I know where you're coming from :-( pero teh, hinay hinay lang. Dapat separated ang personal na buhay sa worklife. There's a term for the act of using power (in the office) over subordinates to get what you want and it starts with "H". You dont want that to tarnish your career.

citybuoy said...

oh no. wag naman ganon. oo, mali si mhw pero ibang usapan na ang trabaho. let's not add to the stereotype.

whatever happens, andito lang kami ha. uy, kape kape na tayo! haha ready na kami to be badinggerzied. :D