Friday, October 13, 2006


As most people would dare notice, this is my first entry after a hundred and so years of hiatus and that this is somewhat or rather completely different entry as opposed to my previous ones.

I've been busier than a carabao during plowing season these past few months because the final quarter of the year is just around the corner and projects keep on coming.

Anyway, this entry is dedicated to myself! I hope I like it! Echoz! Seriously, this entry is especially for a person that is yet to become a very important part of my life (I Hope!!!! I'm so conceited.. Harharhhar!) And he's probably reading this right now.

I have met this person a few years back when my life consisted of basically nothing aside from the fact that I was in my self-discovery phase and my world revolved around deviance, self-expression, pride, marijuana, alcohol, endless parties, egoistic exercises, and conceiving a grand masterplan to eradicate the entire human existence among others. I was lost, and I hate everything that walks, talks, and those who do not put on blush-on properly and have no idea of how valuable SPF 15 is. Anyway, going back to the guy, we met during some gathering that I now find so ridiculous, I couldn't even write anything about it.

To be honest, I had a huge crush on him . . . as in huge . . . but I was so self-absorbed to even notice or acknowledge my attraction to him.

He was simple, quiet but then even before, I could sense that he has a deeper and captivating personality. What I could remember, if my memory serves me right, is that he had this certain fun-loving yet enigmatic aura that made me gravitate toward him as a blackhole sucks everything in its vicinity. I could also remember that I used to keep his picture in my wallet. I don't know how I got hold of that, I don't know if I asked him for that, or I asked somebody to ask him. That I really can't remember. Anyway, it was this passport size picture, though how unflattering it may sound, it still gives me this hair-raising, jaw-clenching-hands-clasping-on-a-table moment of bliss. However, I lost my wallet, we lost communication and there goes the bliss (as if there was really a communication). And oh! By the way, at those times, he had this not-so-uber-hot but . . . . still hot lover whom compared to me is like comparing a butterfly to a moth.

So, for a couple of years, he was just part of my selective memory stashed somewhere in the attic of my subconcious together with the boa feathers and the off-shoulder shirts. . . . .

And then . . . I discovered G4M. Now I know, it sound sooooooo stereotypical but hey! A gay's got to do what a gay's got to do. And besides, I do not want to be stuck in the siberia of cyberworld, forever writing in this blog, while knitting all the flags of the 266 countries of the world.

It was so funny 'coz I came across this forum or thread or whatever the hell you wanna call it - that talks about blogs, gay blogs for that matter. I was surprised to see that some guys recommended badinggerzie. And then, I saw this certain guy in the thread, 'coz they have their pictures also posted there, who sparked a tingling effect in my stomach.

He said there, "I like badinggerzie . . . "

"What the hell," I said to myself and doubleclicked his profile and sent him a message. By the way, due to privacy reasons, I am usng a different name in G4M.

My message to him goes like, "badinggerzie likes you too."

Okay fine!!! Guilty as charged! You can shoot me in Luneta if I won't say that the reason I flirted with him was that I liked his picture and secondly, he has an interest with me (badinggerzie). Sometimes, it gets confusing when you have multiple personalities online. Anyway, I did not read his profile.

After a few days when I sat again in from of my computer with a smile plastered on my face, the same smile that a seven year old girl probably has on her birthday waiting for that surprise gift, which she knows will be a barbie doll, togther with a barbie house, an entire spring collection, a barbie car and of course, Ken . . . . I opened my G4M account and it says there somewhere that I have a message and that I have to go to my message inbox to read (Duh?! I might be gay but Im not stupid to look for my message in the "edit profile folder")

Anyway, the message was from him. I opened it as excited as the sexless jollibee.

The message from him was: "How did you know?"

Then, I smiled, the bridget jones smile and sent a reply: "Let's just say that I am very close to him . . . . "

After that, we had a couple of message exchanges that lasted for about a week or so until he decided to give me his number.

I texted him . . . now, it was more convenient, I do not have to wait for days for a reply.

On our text phase . . . he mentioned that I am somewhat familiar to him. (At this time, I haven't recognize him yet as the guy that I used to have a huge crush on). And he asked if we have already met each other, then, he asked me if I know this certain "friend", he dropped a name, and from there . . . I knew that he was HE whom I owe a lot of my faceless wetdreams that has been bothering me these past few years! Echoz!

Yeah! That's him! That was the guy that I was looking at during those "gatherings" from afar.

After a few more grueling text exchanges for days . . . . . he asked if he can ask me out . . . .

To be continued......

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